What is life without youth? Just after my birthday this month, I have been hearing how ‘being young’ is so very important in this life to be loved and cherished. This is making me wonder what’s going to happen when I get old, when I don’t have this thick hair and smooth skin? yes, people close to me will always be there for me but I am talking about those random people I’m going to meet everyday when I get old. The way they are going to look at me and sympathies my age, will I be content with those apologetic glances? I want to say that I believe aging is a very beautiful process of being mature and experienced but deep down inside, I still shiver to imagine a thousand creases on my skin and grey hair on my head.
Is this insecurity about aging and loosing love and compassion something this society has created inside me? Or was I born with this terrible gut feeling about aging?
The article I shared here, is about a beautiful 1930s’ Club dancer, watching her younger self for the first time on tape. Her vivid emotions and tempations to dance like her younger self again, fresh tears from the eyes and beautiful smiles on her lips gives me hope to celebrate more birthdays and not feel that life is slipping away. But like I said, I need more life experiences to actually hold on to this fleeting hope.
…One day, aging might actually make me proud, not today is not that day. By the way, if you assumed I’m old right now, you might be wrong! Being old scared and amused me at the same time for a long time now. One of these days, I might come back here and write how I have grown out of this fear and found happiness to not worrying about being old and unloved.